A tooth is out. This time, it's the truth! Funny how people have been commenting that Tala will start teething very soon...since she was 2 months! She started drooling a lot when she turned 2 months so people were guessing she'd start teething veeerryyy soon. Finally, that "veerrryyy soon" came in at 6 months. Yesterday, I felt something rough on her lower gums and it's definitley a tooth. My poor Little Spanish has been cranky the whole day yesterday, even today. And I have a feeling that this will last for several days. She demands more attention than ever. It's still easy to make her laugh but after a short while, she'd start crying as if telling me "mami, something's hurting me, make it go away please". It pains me to know that there is nothing much I can do for her but to let her feel I will be there beside her all the time.
Just like how my mom was for me when I was young everytime I was sick. I remember having so much toothache when I was about 8 or 9. My molars were inflamed so it can't be extracted yet. We had to wait till the inflammation and the infection goes away. I was crying incesantly. My mom kept on telling me that she knows how painful it could be, that she understands my frustrations and that I just need to be patient. And then she told me to come near her so she can help me. I put my head on her lap and she gently rubbed the side of my cheek where the hurting molar was, telling me that soon, it'll go away. She didn't stop rubbing my cheek until I fell asleep. I can very well remember how good it felt. It calmed me. It calmed my hurting tooth. Her touch was magic for me.
Now that I'm a mom myself, it's my turn to rub the pain off my Little Spanish Pinay. And now I understand what my mom felt while seeing me hurting. I'm sure she wanted to take the pain to herself instead of me suffering because of that pain. I'm sure she wanted to do more but all she could was to let me feel she'd stay beside me all the time and that we are both in it together. That I wasn't alone and will never be. These are all exactly what I am feeling now for Little Spanish Pinay.
How I miss my mom. How I wish she's here beside me now instead of oceans away so she could see me as a mom myself now and the unconditional love and care that she has given me when I was young, is now being paid forward to another beautiful child of God. I want her to look through my eyes and see her reflections, of how these eyes look at my own daughter the way her very own eyes looks at me. I want her to be proud of me, to be proud of her with the way she has raised me and my other 5 siblings.
My mom has held my hand and now, it is my turn to hold my own daughter's hand.