Monday, April 18, 2011

She Should Go to the Daycare

I just got that comment from a relative-in-law... and to be honest? I was perplexed.  The relative-in-law was obviously referring to Little Spanish Pinay.  I'm just glad that there are many more people in the room  and someone unintentionally changed the topic and the conversation about LSP going to daycare that was about to start was cut off just after the comment was sent out in the air.  Because I know, my reply will not get a nods from anybody except my hubby who's ever supportive with my decisions and choice of parenting.  We basically share the love for attachment parenting and he even expressed one day how happy he is that we chose to co-sleep with LSP.  I was speechless when he bursted that out - but in a good a way.  Feeling-good way.  The way he said it was so tender and heartfelt and I am never ending grateful for my husband about that.

Anyways, back to LSP and daycare.  "LSP should go to daycare"?.  I had to bite my toungue to stop me from doing a Gettysburg-long speech.  And so, here I am typing in my blog to let those suppressed thoughts get out from my already-full-of-thoughts mind.  If the conversation continued with this topic, I'd start off my speech with "LSP should go to daycare? And why would that be?"  I know the answer would be because I've heard of this already from another person who has the same mentality about raising children and sending them off away from home as early as possible.  The answer would be the following:
  • Because they will become more social
  • Because they will become more aware of their surroundings and wiil be smarter
  • Because they will learn so much more than what they can learn from home
  • Because the professors in daycares are professionals and trained about child education
My answer to all those? Plain bull.  Those are bulls.  I have nothing against daycares and I respect all the other parents who really have to send their babies to daycares - I can even admire them especially the working moms who have no choice but to send their babies to daycare because well, they have to work.  I also respect other stay-at-home moms who choose to send their babies to daycare as early as 6 months just because they feel like to or believe that they should (though I don't share the same principle).

But giving me those answers above as if daycare is the better choice than home where babies can stay with their moms all the time and receive all the love and touch and care and time and attention they need?  I think that this kind of reasonings are a product of ignorance and too much modernization.  How can a daycare be "better" than the babies' own home with a ratio of 1 caregiver to 4-6 babies?  This kind of reasonings disavalue parents' especially mom's capacity to take care of their own children and provide the best care any baby can get.  And that ticks me off.

Yesterday, LSP and I went to for her 12-month revision and at the same time for a vaccine.  While in the waiting area, LSP saw a girl - having the age of probably 5 or 6.  At the site of this blond girl holding a baby doll in her arms, LSP got excited and started smiling and pointing the girl while making her ahhhh sound of excitement.  She immediately went down from my lap and proceeded to walk towards the girl.  I followed her as she's not very stable with her walking yet but I kept my distance.  She went directly to the girl seated with her pink ballet uniform.  The girl tried to ignore LSP with an I-don't-care-and-I-don't-want-to-have-anything-to-do-with-you facial expression. Of course, LSP didn't notice that.  She continued to look at the girl, even touch the girls legs tenderly.  The girl played with the her doll, talking to the doll, throwing it up in the air and catching it back then kissing the doll from time to time.  Seeing this, LSP also threw kisses in the air for the girl.  Tala loooves to give kisses. There was also a woman beside the girl and she was smiling at LSP for the gestures that she was doing.  LSP started pointing the woman and smiled back at her and threw another kiss in the air.  The woman was laughing this time and saying how lovely LSP is.  Then LSP looked back at the little girl hoping she'd notice her and probably play with her with the doll.  But nothing.  Until the the girl's turn to go to her pediatrician was up. 

I believe that IS ability to socialize for LSP's part and inability to socialize for the little girl's part.  Now, I do not know if the girl was sent to the daycare as early as 6 months or later but what's clear is that LSP knows how to socialize inspite the fact that she's staying at home with her own mom.  Perhaps the little girl didn't go to the daycare as well... but it only proves that going or not, children may have the tendency to be aloof to strangers - and that is totally OK.  Socializing is an inate ability of human.  Human is a social animal by nature.  Unless there is a big physocological impairness or trauma, then socialization becomes a problem. 

I will not even go through each of the bullet point above since they don't have any basis at all. Homeschooling is even becoming more popular and have proven a lot of advantages over children who go to regular school. Home is the best place for anyone specially babies.  We're talking about a normal functional home here, logically.

Anyways... really, I don't have to be affected by this random comment as I know better than anyone how perfectly our current setup is working for us not to mention how we are tremendously enjoying it - to which, I am ever grateful for.

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