Hot Mami

Hot mess, that is!!

 

It's been really chaotic at home these days. Not that I am complaining as all three of us in our household  are all healthy and so much inlove with each other but things and schedules are all crazy and me, being a scattered-brain to start with, can't just keep up with this crazy, crazy phase in our family life.

 

As I was writing drafting this post, I was in the commissary office waiting for my name to be called. Don't worry, I didn't do anything bad! The only record I have in this country is that I was caught without a seat belt inside a moving car. Long story, but yeah, I am already an offense maker.

 

Anyhooooo, reason that I am here is that I need to get an affidavit of loss for my ID.  I lost it practically without knowing how and when.  I'm kind of in a hurry to get it replaced as we are in the middle of processing some important documents.

 

And hoo, hah! I just learned that I had no idea where my passport is. OUR passports! They are all in one pouch and the location of the said pouch has just decided to elude my memory.  After putting our house upside down, inside out, thank God I was finally able to find 'em.

 

Did I mention already that our house is in total jumble right now? Unshelved (yes, accept that as a word as I have no time to check the dictionary right now, mkay?) groceries are in the hallway and everywhere in the floor kitchen. Documents on top of every furniture. Unloaded dishwasher. A mountain of dirty dishes.  Unfolded clothes. Unmade beds. Gooey bathrooms. Toys everywhere (ok, that is forgivable). Bunny dusts on the floor, everywhere. Umm, that's it. I shall not continue describing the state of the house right now before I start to pick my eyebrows and eat 'em.

 

And oh! I can't count how many days hubby and I haven't eaten a decent lunch. We simply couldn't find time to cook and well, even sit down together and munch each other. I mean, munch something together.   

 

My day job? Not spared from all my hullabaloos... I did mistakes here and there that could have hurt my career if only my bossess do not know me. 

 

Ok, so my name was called in the commissary and proceeded inside the office to tell them my story.  I sat on the chair infront of the table where the officer is seated on the other side.  He asked me what is my business there and just before I could open my mouth, my stupid very hungry tummy made the most awful, embarrassing sound it ever made in my whole entire life.  I was hoping the officer didn't hear any of it but judging from his awkward facial expression, there was no denying that he didn't hear it.  My face was burning with embarrassment and with a sheepish smile, I just said "Uhm, I haven't had lunch, sorry".  And the rest of the 10 minutes was just me stammering in Spanish.

 

Good thing the officer new I am already married otherwise, he might have been thinking by now "Poor girl, she'll surely be single for the rest of her life".  Or perhaps he's thinking something like "poor husband...".

 

I couldn't even imagine if I would be able to survive the past week but I'm here, finishing this article so  I guess yes, I did survive last week.  I survived it with bruises and an ego resting on the floor but I survived.  Because mamas have no other option but to survive, right?

 

Tell me I'm not the only one who has days like this.

Homemade Skinless Longganisa

Longganisa is one of my classic comfort food.   Although we have chorizo here in Spain, it's really nothing like longganisa from my beloved Philippines. 

 

I have been wanting to be able to make one but haven't really found an easy recipe so thank goodness to my pretty preggy friend Dianne as she was able to find one.  The plus side is that she has already tried this and approved of the result.  Being a great foodie that she is, I have no doubts the recipe is really going to give good results.

 

It took me a while before I was able to finally make this on my own as life happens and this mama gets burried with so much work and mama duties.

 

I did some modifications on the recipe to suit my liking... for one, I love my longganisa just a  tad bit on the sweeter side so, I used a bit more sugar.  You can refer to Dianne's recipe for the original recipe.

My recipe below is probably just good for 2-3 people so double it if you want a big batch.  Dianne's recipe calls for 1.5lbs ground pork and that's about 680 grams.

 

Ingredients:

 

250grams ground pork (I used the mix kind - mixed beef and pork)
1 carrot, grated (my special ingredient)

1.5 Tbs brown sugar

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp freshly cracked black pepper (I may have used a bit more)

5 cloves garlic (yes, I used 5 times the original recipe.  we love garlic in the house so, need I say more?)

1/2 tsp anato/atsuete powder (I don't have anato seeds here)

1 Tbsp vinegar

1 or 2 tbsp of red wine
a little butter

Let's get down to the business.

Mix all ingredients in a bowl except for the wine and the butter.  Mix it good until all ingredients are well incorporated.  You can use a spoon or your clean hand. Hand is better.

I like sneaking in veggies in my dishes so I thought I'd sneak in some grated carrots in this. It wasn't a bad idea at all!

 

Roll a part of the mixture to a cling wrap.  The amount depends on how big or long you would want the longganisa to be.  I did about an inch thick.

Now, here's a trick I did.  I closed the sides of the cling wrap (after the longganisa is rolled inside) and made a knot on each side.  This made the longgaisa more compact and sort of tube-like round.

does this remind you of the classic ice candy?

excuse the blurry photo. I was just using my phone camera on my left hand.

 

You gotta let it cure overnight inside the fridge.  But if you are impatient like me, 1 or 2 hours may already be good... but not as good as overnight, so remember that ;-)

I also have a slightly different way of cooking longganisa.  I've used my mom's classic way of cooking longganisa and also added some Spanish touch to it.

 

In a skillet, I put the longganisa (cling wrap removed) with a little bit of water.  Let the water boil.  This way, I am more confident that the longganisa would be well cooked until the core part.  I love meat and I love it well done.  I may have also sprinkled the longganisa a dash of brown sugar while it's cooking (yes more)... but that really depends on your liking.

 

When the water is about to get dry, pour in your red wine. This gives tanginess to the longganisa and that nice dark color.  I am thinking that with the wine, you can totally ommit the anato powder.

Oh, just imagine how the mixture of different tastes would explode in your mouth with every bite!

Let it simmer until it caramelizes a bit.  Then put a little butter or if you prefer to be healthier, use vegetable or olive oil.  I used butter!

Then just let it fry until golden brown and the caramel becomes sticky.

 

You wanna be more sinful?  Cleanup that caramel in the frying pan with rice!

Yes, I committed more sin by frying the rice on the longganisa caramelized drippings!   And I must say, it is all worth it! Every.single.calorie.
 

BOW!

 

 

 

 

 

 

You got an issue? Here's a tissue!

This entry has actually been sitting in my draft for about 3 weeks now.  I couldn't even get a quarter of an hour to finish it and as I read it back it sounds too whiney to be published.  And I feel like I've been a totally hot mess that I had second thoughts about publishing it.  But then again, this is real life.  There IS mess and chaos in a real home.  And there IS stress and tears and own-hair-pulling and lost of words and desperation in a life of a normal mama like me.

I do want to chronicle our adventure in parenthood and our daughter's development and so I shall not miss this part either especially through these experiences, I have become a better mami even for just a little bit.

So lately (been a while, in reality), the Little Spanish Pinay has been experimenting with her new discovery.  That she is an individual with her own decisions and capability to actually say NO anytime she wants to.  And she finds it really cool. I do know and understand this phase but somehow with the stress of daycare adjustments (back in early September), workload (from my day job) and super backlogged housechores (because of camping-in at inlaw's house on August); and then add the desire of wanting to squeeze in blogging and crafting and baking in the middle, I found myself short on patience and gentleness during those hectic moments.

There were those days where LSP seems to be just being a big pain in the bottom. And one day, I fell deep into that pit where I have told myself I would never jump into.  Nor even peek.  We had a hard time in the morning preparing LSP to go to daycare as she was just plainly refusing everything.  She's taking forever to finish her potty, claiming that she's not yet done.  She didn't want to get dressed.  She didn't like her socks.  She didn't like her shoes.  I literally had to wrestle her (which I really hate to do) to get dressed as we were simply running late.  I had to let her wear her house slippers because that's what she preferred over any shoes I offer her.  (side note:  A couple of days prior, we went to daycare without her wearing socks nor shoes because she just doesn't want to wear ANY shoes).

The ultimate act was when she matter-of-factly emptied a pack of cashew nuts on the floor.  Her face was that of a smirk (I must admit cute, at that) that says "Let's see what you'll do about this, mami".

I snapped.

I yanked her up and sat her on our sofa.  Naturally she started crying.   I told her that we do not throw food on the floor, that what she did is wrong, etc.  She kept crying.  I told her she have to ask for an apology.  She didn't want to.  I got agitated even more.  I got angry.  She got angrier.  Until everything just turned into a vicious cycle.  She started putting her whole fist in her mouth and that made her vomit.  Upon seeing this, hubby got too worried and said "that's it", he's picking up LSP.  I got angry on hubby and told him no as she is just trying to get our attention.  I was trying to let her stay in the sofa until she apologizes.   So my angst got extended to hubby.  The whole battle about me getting LSP apologize for what she did lasted for about 10minutes until I told her if she will not apologize, she'll be sleeping ALONE tonight.

Scared of the ultimatum, she held my face with both her hands and told me mami, perdon! perdon! (mami, I'm sorry! I'm sorry!).

I won the battle.

But I didn't feel good.  Suddenly, the way she held my face with both her face made me feel really bad about forcing her to apologize.  She apologized alright, but what I have just taught her is to use apologizing as a negotiating tool and not to express empathy or remorse for what she has done wrong.

I held her and hugged her and kissed her.  She immediately stopped crying and we went to her room.  We laid down on her bed while she hugged me tightly.  She never stopped looking at me on my face as if trying to measure if I am still angry.  I suddenly felt my excess hot blood immediately left my head.  I calmed down.  She asked to be nursed and in just a few minutes, she fell asleep. 

I felt tears welled up in my eyes.  I lost.  It shouldn't even be a battle in the first place.

I was so consumed about ME being tired with so many things and to top it all off, my toddler is making it all harder for me. Me. Me. Me.  I was thinking so much about ME being the victim of all these.  Boo hoo!

I forgot that my toddler is also undergoing a big emotional stress and big transitions.  I forgot that my toddler does not take changes so easily.  I forgot that my toddler lacks emotional maturity to handle this without her getting fussy.  I forgot that my toddler melts down when she's tired and that's her only outlet.  I forgot that my toddler is in a stage where she experiments on our own reactions with her every action and that seeing us get nervous, surprised, or even angry is fun.  I forgot that my toddler wouldn't know just yet to "want" to make me suffer because she at her age, is too innocent for that.

I forgot to show her even more love in her moments when she seems to be unlovable.

I do have moments when I just don't know what's wrong with me and I'd be in such a bad mood.  In fact, this happens monthly.  It's a girl's thing. When I get hormonal, I wouldn't want hubby to tell me "Honey, you have to go to that corner and think about what you have done. You have been acting weird and unfair so take some moment and face the wall.  When you're ready you have to apologize".  I swear, if he does this, I would go ballistic.  What I would want to hear him tell me is "Honey, you are having such a bad day today and you seem to be so stressed.  Why not take a hot bath, and have some coffee or go out and have a walk or just do whatever that will make you feel better.  I'll take care of the house, don't worry".   That's what we all want, yeah?  But I forgot that my toddler would also like something the same on her days when she woke up with the wrong foot.

Thankfully, we were able to get away as a family and find some peace and relaxation before the end of September. It was refreshing and recharging. It was really that hubby and I got to really talk and he was able to remind me so many things about our wonderful little sucker. I really thank God for having the kind of husband that I have and the kind of father he is toour Little Spanish Pinay.


I still have moments with the little sucker when I just want to eat my eyebrows because we are still in that big toddler phase but I have been really trying to remind myself about being a gentle mama.  Because that is what I want to be for her.  It does make a huge difference with the way she responds to us on her stormy moments.  Talking to her helps a lot.  Even at those moments that she seems like she doesn't hear us because she's over the top of her lungs screaming and wiggling, most often than not, we get surprised because suddenly it would seem like what we tell her made sense to her and she would start to calm down.  The key is never reciprocate her agitation with agitation.  Staying calm (which is soooooo hard but doable) is a must. 

Sometimes I just fail to stay calm but I don't beat myself up about that anymore.  I know I can start over and that I can ask her to forgive me for getting angry.  And she ALWAYS say yes, she forgives me.  That little twerp is really innocent and pure hearted, you know?

So there.  Every time I find myself getting near the end of the rope, and feeling like a victim of the circumstance, I'd stop and tell myself:  You got issue? Here's a tissue!

and I also look at this picture because her smile is just something that always, always make me smile too.

Friday Fun Food: Baked Donuts

So, Mommy Maggie has tempted me with her baked donuts.  I tell you, I couldn't get it off my mind.  I was waiting till she shares to us her recipe I am able to find a donut molder  (Just teasing, mommy Maggie! :-D ) but hoo hah, one time while Pinteresting, I found this recipe and I just couldn't wait anymore.  I still don't have a donut molder but I thought, what the heck.

 

I said,  I will turn them into a full-fledged donuts, holes included... by hook or crook!

 

I used my good ol' cupcake silicon molder and just poked a hole in the middle of each "donut" using apple core remover (is that how it is called?)

 

The secret weapon

 

When I was all done, making my improvised donut holes, I was blowing the smoke from my apple core remover Lara Croft style.

 



 And there they are!  They look poorly but hey, wait till they get all dressed up!

 

Patience is not one of my strength.  Consider this a warning... let the donuts cool off before trying to remove them from the molder. Or they will end up like this!

 

Peanut butter glaze, baby!

 

So there.  The recipe yielded about a dozen donuts in a mini size... (think of the diameter of a normal cupcake).   There is definitely going to be a repeat of this recipe! Ñom!

 

Recycled Nescafe Jar

Have I already mentioned that Pinterest is addicting? Man, it seriously is! I find myself pinterest-ing every.single.night. Once the little one starts to do her little snores, I'd take my mobile and put myself under the blanket and start browsing through the bazillion ideas one can find in the sweet addicting world of Pinterest.  Yes, it could be possible that I am losing sleep because of too much Pinterest-ing.

Anyhoo... as I was browsing and pinning, I found this work of a really artsy man named Eric Barclay.  One of his works is this:

Isn't this too adorable??? I tell you, the guy is full of creativity and talent!

And since this is about recycling (I've been very gung-ho about recycling but just couldn't find time) and by a very, very good chance, I have one empty Nescafe bottle lying around the house, I said I must try this! 

And here is the result of my wannabee-artist work.  I know, it's far (like oceans afar!) from Eric's work but hey, the colors I used are all I have at the time AND I swear, my hand wouldn't just stop from trembling while I was trying to paint the bottle.  I don't really know what I was so nervous about.  And that crackled effect near the whites... and what's going on with the white?  Looks like I used a liquid paper.  I tell you I did not.  I used a super old white paint marker... but I guess it's already super old, that's why.

 

 

But I am still happy with the outcome.  My striped cat turned out cute in its own unique style, yes?  Maybe I'd get better on the next ones.  Maybe I should also get nicer colors to use, yeah? I still have to think of what to store in it.  For now,  it holds small knick-knacks in the kitchen.  But it should find a better purpose.  Maybe nuts? Or Sugar perhaps?  What would you use a bottle like this for?

 

 

Friday Fun Food: Peanut Butter and Choc Chips Muffin

Whoa! I've almost forgotten I have blog.  Thanks to some of you lovely readers who have reminded me that I'm somehow being missed :) 

I do have tons of stories to tell and most are about the dramatic and at the same time blissful moments of a mama but today is Friday so I decided to share something yummy.  See, ever since the Little Spanish Pinay started daycare, I've been cooking and baking nonstop because this mama strives hard to prepare homemade packed lunch and snaks for that little woman.

I got this recipe from Pinterest.  Ugh, this website is addicting, I tell you.  Here's the direct link where I copied the recipe from. 

So here is the recipe lineup:

2 1/4 cups flour

2 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt

2/3 cup brown sugar

6tbsp butter, melted and cooled

1/2 cup peanut butter (cruncy or smooth)

2 eggs

1 cup milk

3/4 cup chocolate chips

See that big tub of baking powder? A product of compulsive buying! I don't know what was I thinking buying that humongous amount of baking powder.  Not like I own a baking shop!  

And oh, that carton on the upper right corner?  That's milk.  Sheep's milk!  It's actually equivalent to a half and half milk.  The recipe calls for a normal milk - whole milk I suppose but since this is all I have (and soymilk), then this is what I used.  Sheep's milk is more digestive than a cow's milk so this is our staple milk at home :)  I won't be able to tell the difference it will make on the muffin but I can tell you that the muffins turned out quite succulent!

Eeeeniways, here's the direction.

1. Preheat oven to 375ºF (190ºC).  I do not usually preheat my oven before I start everything.  I do things slowly... most often than not, even the instruction says 15minutes prep time, I would consume double or so. Hence, so as not to waste power (and money), I usually preheat the oven when I am starting to pour in the batter into the molders.  I just make sure that the even preheats for at least 10mins.

2. In a large bowl, wisk together the dry ingredients.   

That wisk without a handle is from my stick blender that broke.  The wisk works just like any other wisk so I decided it will not go to the trash :-)

3.   In a medium bowl, whisk the melted butter, peanut butter, eggs and milk until smooth.  Now, I may or may have not purposely let the peanut butter overflow from the measuring cup... but hey, I love peanut butter! Especially my homemade peanut butter!

4. Pour into flour mixture and stir until just combined. 

5. Stir in those yummy choc chips!  Batter will be thick.

6.  Divide batter into the paper-lined muffin or cupcake molders.  Each cup should be filled to the top and not just half way up to get that nice dome on the muffin.

note:  The original recipe said this will make 24 muffins... I was only able to do 17!  I think when it says fill up to the top, I understood it like overflowing a little bit.  I guess I have the tendency to exagerate a bit.

7. Bake for 17-20 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean and the top of the muffin springs back when lightly pressed.

 

Hello beauties!

They are really nice to the pallette.  One bite and you'll be asking for more!  Hubby's comment is that it could still probably use some more sugar... but what can I say? Hubby has a very sweet tooth.  He's on the upper extreme of the sweeth tooth level.

So, tah-tah for now and happy weekend everyone!

Our breastfeeding journey coming to an end and sharing another mom's must-read breastfeeding success story

2 yrs and almost 5 months and we are still breastfeeding.  I've been really on and off about weaning.  Some difficult days, I'd stick a middle finger about "child-led-weaning" and some days where unicorns fly around us, I'd wish the moment that she'd ask to be nursed won't end.   I am seeing the near-end of our breastfeeding moment, though.  My supply is very low already.  Little Spanish Pinay herself would even tell me ya no hay leche, mami (no more milk, mami) like as if she's complaining and demanding for more.  So I guess, sooner or later, she'd get tired of sucking and would move on to her life without Las Boobies.  

How do I feel about that?

I am already nostalgic about it.

I am looking forward to it at the same time.

I feel triumphant as we really had a tough start on breastfeeding and that I have told myself 2yrs is the minimum time I'd breastfeed LSP.

If this is a novel, we are indeed nearing the denouement.

Speaking of a novel, I'd like to share another success story of a friend on breastfeeding.  Because novel = story.  I know, I'm good on segues. 

It is a really touching and beautiful story of courage, dedication and pure mommy love!  I do feel compelled to share this because I know that it may help other moms or mom-to-bes who want to really succeed on breastfeeding.  Please click the whole quote below to read the whole story.

"I set out with the benefits for the baby in mind, but I never thought that it could also be the best for me, in ways I didn’t intend. " -- Chichi Sotomil

Photo grabbed from Chichi Sotomil's fb page

p.s. Last month is Breastfeeding Awareness Month.  But I am extending it to this month and to all the months of the year. Because breastfeeding is that awesome!

Worldless Wednesday: "Fashion Fades. Style is Eternal"

Author, educator and parenting speaker, Vivian Kirkfield: Is Your Child Being Bullied?

I am really excited to share this clip of a short interview of Vivian Kirkfield by 9News TV. She has stated great tips on detecting whether your child is being bullied at school:

   Vivian is also the author of this equally amazing book: Show Me How! Build Your Child's Self-Esteem Through Reading, Crafting and Cooking

I have personally own (with Vivian's authograph, nothing less!!) and read this book and been trying some of the activities with my little one.  It is surely one way to spend quality time with your children and be involved with them.  Getting involved with your children can also help them be more confident of themselves and open to communication with us, parents.  This may also help them easily talk to us when they experience bullying at shool.

 

p.s. I am a fan of Vivian :)

To the most wondeful man on earth and in the universe...

Happy birthday.

... did I say he rocks as a father too.

 

He's all good. All good.   There's really not much men like him in this world anymore.  Little Spanish Pinay and I are the luckiest girls for having him in our lives.  He got us fallen in love with him.  More everyday.  We love you, papi!