Sunday, July 25, 2010

Beautiful

I was wearing the crappiest ready-to-retire tank top, my still-a-bit-big tummy coming out of my oversized shorts, my hair clumsily tied back after a bad hair cut, with a face being pulled down by gravity, I came out of the bathroom after washing little Spanish Pinay's shirt full of poop (believe me, I don't know how she did it but she pooped and it reached almost up to the back of her neck).  I saw my husband who was in the living room carrying our little angel and his eyes were fixed on me.  Then he said "You look very beautiful.  Your hair looks good on you".  I could have immediately think he's trying to tease me by being sarcastic but with those dreamy eyes and faint smile he has, I just knew those words were from his soul.  Few tears wanted to escape from my eyes but I played it cool and gave him a "whatever" face.  After a long and tiring day, and feeling abandoned by myself, making me not want to see me in the mirror, God knows my husband's words were such a big self-esteem booster for me.  I couldn't believe after all the above description of myself, he sees me as someone beautiful.

Later at night, after I have put Tala to sleep, I cuddled up with hubby and told him I feel ugly (wanting to hear him again telling me I am beautiful :-D).  He told me "No way, you're more beautiful than ever".  I told him he's just saying that because he's my husband and that he loves me.  Then he told me he's saying that because he has eyes and he has a good taste and kissed me on my temple.  I smiled.  Love is indeed not blind.  Love actually sees more.  I've obviously changed after my pregnancy and I don't exactly like the changes especially that I barely have time to wash my hair, and yet I have this wonderful man here beside me still adores me and sees me as attractive, that's definitely love.  I shed a few tears.  It was a mixed emotions feeling sad about how my body changed and at the same time so happy for the warm feeling of being loved and adored.

Short moments of baby blues aftermath.

1 comment:

  1. You're looking more beautiful every day, both the inside and the outside of you, especially after giving birth, there is like a light in your eyes, a light in your face, that makes you look so special. If Tala stole beauty from you when she was in your tummy, like people say that babies in tummies do, she is giving you double back now.

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