I was in the airplane when I have drafted this entry and has been longing to hear and see and talk and touch and hug and kiss my mag-ama (husband and daughter) is just killing me. My stomach was producing too much acidity (and gases…shhhhhh!) thye've just made the entire flight uncomfortable. I got lucky I was moved to the emergency exit seats that I got all 3 seats just for me, not to mention the extra leg room. Still I am quite uncomfortable. It’s hard to bear. I’ve been thinking about my daughter since last night when we left her at my inlaws’ house and already then, it’s driving me crazy. I wondered how she’s doing, if she was already sleeping, if she was crying, if she was waking up from time to time looking for me, if she’s having a hard time in the bathroom, if she hurt herself, If she got scared of something from the TV, if she’s eating well or not… tons of worries that’re driving me nuts.
Drama, right? That’s really mostly the life of a mama… tons of drama.
It’s tough but I’m an adult, a mature one and I am supposed to deal with this like an adult. I can’t have a meltdown and throw myself on the floor while I kick and arch my back like a toddler. Maybe I can do that later in the hotel. No one would know.
On the other hand, I want to think that this short separation may actually do us good. It’s only 3 weeks. Only. I have to convince myself that it is “only”. Career-wise, this travel is really something good for me. After 5 long years, it’s time to reconnect with my team back in Ohio and put faces on the voices of the members of my team I haven’t met personally. It’s also time to get more involve with the new technologies newly employed and will-be employed in the environment. And as for Little Spanish Pinay, it could be the little push that can help her learn more on independence and trusting on herself that it’s ok to be apart even for just a short time from mami. It will be a good opportunity so she can bond more with my in-laws and her papi as well.
So yes, I’ll try to be more positive about this and put my best face forward. So I'm putting my make up and the chirpiest smile while I'm in the office.
Oh and hey, this short work-assignment may probably give me more time to blog, so yey?