Saturday, April 3, 2010

The Waiting Game

We're on our 38 weeks! I am going stir crazy with so much anticipation.  When will the big day gonna be?  I know it's very very soon but it just seems like I've been waiting for like forever.  Only one week has gone by since our full term has passed but I feel like it has been a month!

My tummy has grown too heavy for my scoliosis-afflicted lower back - making almost every movement very difficult.  Walking up a plight of stairs is a big calvary.  I would end up running out of breath after a short shower.  My doctor has given me temporary disability due to my back problems and other difficulties.  I just can't continue working anymore.  In spite of physical exhaustion I feel everyday, my mind is always up and about.  I have so many thoughts going on in my head, different emotions filling up my chest - adds up to the reasons why sleep evades me at night.

38 weeks, 66kg, 104 cm

This waiting game is becoming a fountain of anxieties for me and hubby.  But it's all very exciting.  I am trying to enjoy the end of my pregnancy now in spite of all the physical pains I am experiencing.  I'm pretty sure I will miss this.  My hubby and I have been on the look out for the signs that labor is on its way.  As a first-time-mom-to-be, I am so unsure whether I am already getting some early signs of labor or not... obviously, as of this moment, I haven't had any signs of labor yet but I'd always think(imagine) some signs are already manifesting.

I still have some schedule for check ups with the midwife and OB\Gyne - not to mention one more day of preparatory class.  Sometimes I just want everything to be done and over with so I can focus on my waiting game.  I just want to sit in the sofa, stare at my belly and wait till I start to notice the signs of labor (what a cuckoo).  Good thing I have people around me that distracts me and make me think of something else.

I really miss my family back in Manila more than ever.  They are all very excited about little Spanish Pinay.  They are also astounded by my enormous tummy.  This size wasn't expected at all.  All my family and relatives keep telling me that during my mom's and older sister's pregnancies, their tummy was just half the size of mine.  I'd often tell them, blame it on the genes of hubby... he was a whopping 5kg-baby when he was born.  Oh God help me that little Spanish Pinay won't be as big as he was.

So the waiting game is on.... and I do, do, do hope it won't be for long.  

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